Evidence of 2004 tsunami lingers on 2 years later. Gle Jong, Aceh-Indonesia
2006 was not a big blog year for this wanderlust despite yet another travel-filled year. Nevermind because this blogger hasn't been too worried that her content no longer has the allure of adventurous tales but has rather turned into a dull (yet colorful) on-line itinerary for her family and friends to follow so they know she's alive enough to turn on her computer wherever she may be...
...at least not until I saw that my dear friend Arabesque has dubbed me as, "Wanderlustress - saving the world one community at at time"!!! Sure, I might deserve such accolades but does my blog warrant it?!?...not any more. And here's why:
My brief exposure to the world of humanitarian aid has made me a cynic, not sure of who I'm actually helping, and even more unsure of whether we're doing it right if we are indeed genuinely trying to serve our beneficiaries. Both the Sudan and this assignment in Aceh has so far felt more like I'm "saving development programs one office at a time". Having been trained (literally arse kicked) by the corporate world, I miss the professionalism, efficiency and accountability (to name a few essentials missing from my (I'll repeat) brief, and narrow experience in the running of an international NGO). This is the reason for a vacuous blog and oh so many therapeutic getaways...my time is completely taken up by filling a management vacuum (aka doing some arse kicking myself), the frustrations of which require me to extricate myself from the mere thought of work at the end of each day if I am to maintain a healthy, sane social life and marriage...easier said than done by a work addicted perfectionist.
And what I actually do have to say about my work, the needs of the 2004 tsunami effected community, the Indonesian culture and my daily life travails may be prematurely and wrongly portrayed with hints of cynicism that I dare not write at all. So call me a coward blogger...Its ok, I've felt this way before after getting burned by Peace Corps for blogging about Andijon in May 2005. Nearly got myself kicked out just because I was one of the few voices heard and sought after in a little place where the whole world decided to briefly turn its attention. I have not been comfortable with editorial responsibility since.
But perhaps I take myself too seriously as an aid worker and a blogger, or I'm actually a lazy blog sloth, or a jaded wanderlust finding little in the world worthy of my time and interest...
I'm staying tuned myself to see what 2007 will bring!
Happy New Year Everybody!